MOTO2N FAQ
What kinds of bikes do you work on?
I DO NOT WORK ON F*&%ING HARLEYS AT ALL.
NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT.
I specialize in
- Scooters regardless of where they come from (China, Taiwan, Japan, Italy)
- Japanese motorcycles and ATVs
I DO NOT WORK ON HARLEY DAVIDSONS, tractors, snowmobiles, jet-skis, boats, motorized bicycles, aircraft, generators, chainsaws, or anything that’s powered by electricity.
I work on vintage bikes and mopeds on a case-by-case basis. “Vintage” to me means anything made before about 1995. A “moped” is any machine w/ PEDALS and an engine.
My scooter is inside my house or apartment, and I cannot get it out. Can you work on it in here?
Hard no. It’s a massive safety issue for me in so many ways that I don’t think I have to explain. Please find a way to get your scooter into a garage or out into a parking lot or on a sidewalk or literally anywhere that’s not inside your living space before you book me to work on it.
Is a Chinese scooter good, reliable transportation to get me to work?
Unless you know how to fix it on the side of the road all by yourself, absolutely fucking not. They’re gigantic pieces of shit. I’m talking about Tao Tao and other no name “scooters” here NOT Kymco, Genuine, E-ton, etc, which are TAIWANESE and made with pretty decent quality control standards in mind. Taiwan is not the same as China. It’s not even remotely the same country.
I hesitate to work on ANY older bike that someone plans to use as “reliable transportation” because it’s likely to end in tears, and I don’t like to be on the hook for other peoples’ stupid choices. Allow me to be frank (Hi Frank!), I work on peoples’ toys, not their transportation problems. I’ve seen the ass chewings perfectly good auto mechanics are subjected to on a routine basis when it costs more money or takes more time than some poor schmuck has to fix his piece of shit used car. I did not sign up for that shit one bit when I started working on scooters and motorcycles.
There are a MULTITUDE of reasons people tend to gravitate towards driving cars and trucks here in Colorado as opposed to riding motorbikes, and I’m not going to get into why that is. Just know that if you’re planning on using a Chinese scooter, or any older ragged out machine, to get yourself to work every day without having a Plan B and a Plan C in place, I don’t know what to say other than that’s a very bad idea, and it probably won’t go well for you, and I want no part of it.
Here’s a thought: get your shit together, buy a car, save up some money AND THEN buy some toys. Scooters and motorcycles count as toys in the USA.
It cost me a lot of money to have you fix my scooter last year, then I let it sit from November to March. You’re going to come and get it going again for free right? I mean, I did pay you a lot of money last year.
First of all, whatever you think “a lot of money” is, I don’t know, and I can’t speak to that. It cost more than maybe you thought it would because your bike needed a lot of work and/or parts. It’s all on the invoice.
I’m not sure what makes some people think that because I fixed their bike last year, that I’m obligated to fix it in perpetuity for no additional money. I’m not sure what makes some people think I care about their personal financial situations.
Allow me to be unequivocal: you and I are not friends or family, and I care as much as you’re paying me to care, just like every other business in the United States of America.
Wait, you do this for money?
Yes. I do this for money. It’s my full time job, my day job, obsession made manifest, an extended love note to all things that go braap. As much as I would love to be the Johnny Appleseed of scooters and motorcycles, I can’t afford to work on your bike for free.
What’s it cost to, you know, have you come out and take a look at my machine?
My minimum is $107.50 (for Denver and Metro area, more in the Springs). That gets you 30 minutes of diagnostic time ($63.75) along with my service call ($40) and shop supplies ($3.75)
All of this is explained on the pricing page of this website.
How much does it cost to get my scooter/motorbike/quad fixed?
It depends on what’s wrong with your machine.
I won’t know what’s wrong with your scooter until I look at it.
Ballpark pricing is anywhere from $107.50 (my minimum) to $500+.
How does your pricing work?
It works the same as every other mechanic. You can read more about it by clicking here.
Diagnosing the problem is “time in” at $127.5/hr. Once I know what’s wrong with your bike, I stop the clock and complete an estimate. You approve the estimate, and I complete the work.
It takes between 5 and 30 minutes to diagnose most motorbike problems.
My customers tell me I’m less expensive than taking their bikes to a shop despite the fact I price my services like most motorbike shops. I’m more than reasonable, and I have 300+ references for you to call to verify I am what I say I am and do what I say I’m going to do.
I’m confused. How much does it cost to fix my scooter?
It depends on your scooter, what’s wrong with it, the cost of parts, etc.
If you’re worried about the cost of having a skilled mechanic repair or maintain your bike, I suggest you learn how to repair or maintain it yourself.
I charge $127.5/hr to diagnose your bike’s issue or issues. This takes between 5 and 30 minutes or $10 to $63.5. Once I know what’s wrong with your bike, I work up a flat-rate estimate that includes diagnostic time, labor time, parts, the service call, and shop supplies.
A ballpark figure is anywhere between $107.25 for simple problems to $500+ for more complex or multiple issues, depending on what’s wrong with your bike.
What’s it cost to have you look at my bike?
My minimum is $101.25, which includes the service call, shop supplies, and 30m of “time in” labor.
I tried to book online, but it says it costs $235. Then I saw it costs $107.50 on a different page. Which one is it?
You won’t be charged anything when you book online. You won’t be charged anything until I actually fix OR diagnose your bike. Believe me, I wish it was easy as saying “I can fix your bike for $300 no matter what’s wrong with it!” That’s just not how it works.
The $235 figure includes a half hour of diagnostic time ($63.5), an hour of flat rate labor ($127.5) and my service call ($40) and shop supplies ($3.75).
The $107.25 figure includes a half hour of diagnostic time ($63.5), service call ($40), and shop supplies ($3.75). Quite frankly, and as I’ve written half a dozen times or more on this very page, I have no idea how much money it’s going to cost to fix your bike until I figure out what’s wrong with it and work up an estimate.
My minimum is $107.5. I can fix MOST (but not all) bikes for a couple, few hundred bucks. If “a couple, few hundred bucks” is “a lot of money” for you, you might want to buy some tools and learn how to DIY.
Still confused. What’s it going to cost to fix my bike?
Seriously?
It’s $127.5/hr to diagnose your bike’s issue or issues.
It takes me between 5 and 30+ minutes to figure it out. Once I know what it’ll take, I work up an estimate.
Why do you keep repeating yourself?
Because I get asked the same question over and over and over again, and it drives me crazy.
What’s it cost to? My mama always told me if I had to ask, I probably couldn’t afford it.
Why do I have to give you my credit/debit card info to book online?
When you book online, I know you have an Internet connection, enough brain cells to use that Internet connection, a bank account, and a credit/debit card.
I would MUCH RATHER deal with someone like you, who takes the time to read about what I’m up to, books online, and kind-of-sort-of has their shit together, than someone who thinks the Internet is a fad and has a pre-paid flip-phone and $43 in his pockets.
You won’t be charged anything until AFTER I have fixed OR diagnosed your machine.
I’ve tried calling like a million times, but nobody ever picks up. What gives?
I get extremely busy during the warm months.
So busy I don’t have time to take or return calls.
If you really want to get on my schedule, book online. I’ve made this really easy for you to do.
I let my bike sit over winter. What’s it going to cost to make it run again?
9 times out of 10 (but not every time), your scoot will need a battery, a carburetor cleaning, and a spark plug to run like it did last summer. ASSUMING it doesn’t need anything else, that’s $200-$235 “all in”.
What if my bike needs parts?
I collect all of the money for the parts along with 25-50% of the estimated labor. I then order the parts and schedule a second appointment to finish fixing your bike.
What do you mean by “arrival time” anyway? Are you going to be here at 9AM/2PM sharp or what?
“Arrival time” means I will be there BETWEEN 9 and 10AM OR 2 and 3PM. It’s a one-hour gap, and I will text you about an hour ahead of time to let you know EXACTLY when I will be there.
9-10AM or 2-3PM DOES NOT MEAN I WILL BE THERE at 9AM or 2PM sharp.
9-10AM is a one-hour gap. 2-3PM is a one-hour gap. I will text you about an hour-ish ahead of time to let you know exactly when I will be there. I will be there sometime between 9 and 10AM or 2 and 3PM.
I can’t get a landscaper, plumber, electrician, or cable guy to show up at my place at an exact time, at all. They have 4-hour gaps. I do a 1-hour gap.
Your appointment will be for 9-10AM or 2-3PM unless we agree on something different. These are arrival times. That means I’ll show up sometime BETWEEN either 9AM and 10AM or 2PM and 3PM. I’ll text you an exact time about an hour ahead of time.
Do I need to be here for you to work on my bike?
Nope.
Park your scooter/bike somewhere I can access it and let me know where you’ve hidden the keys.
If you have a garage, leave the keys in your scoot/bike and text me your garage code or other instructions to get inside. I have codes for more multi-million-dollar homes and commercial properties than I have fingers toes beans whatever to count. So far so good.
You can absolutely trust me to lock up properly when I leave, too. I will NOT leave your place unsecured.
I have an old/unusual/interesting/weird bike. Do you work on weird stuff?
I do but only if I find it interesting, and I DO NOT charge top dollar for projects I find interesting but know very little about or have very little experience with. Recent “interesting” projects include a 60s Sears/Puch Allstate 250, a 70s Triumph, a ’78 Honda Express w/ the wind-up starter, and more ancient dirtbikes, ATVs, and trikes than I have fingers to count.
I need my bike fixed ASAP. Can you show up today?
No. I am NOT sitting on my ass just waiting for YOU to call me. I get more calls than I can handle, and, if you sound impatient, broke, unreasonable, or just flat out mean, I won’t return your call.
Nothing happens super-fast in the world of motorbikes unless everyone gets extremely lucky and everything breaks just right. It might take 3-4 days to return your call, and I’ll likely be booking for the next week or week after. If your bike needs parts, add another week AT LEAST. Sometimes two.
In my experience, my timelines are on par with or faster than most of the shops I’ve worked at, which is pretty darn good considering I’m mobile.
Can you fix my bike today or tomorrow?
No.
I get booked out a week or more from March to November. If you’re SUPER NICE and/or a repeat customer, I may be able to offer you a fresh slot when someone cancels, which doesn’t happen very often.